binaryalchemist

I wrote this for the filk I'm going to tomorrow night--my voice may suck, but this will be fun--my first ever ABBA filk:

COMMANDO!

(TTTO “FERNANDO” by Bjorn Ulvaeus, Benny Andersson, Stig Anderson )

by Aunty Binary, 2010

You were going out commando—

You had won an Ebay auction for a kilt of Scottish plaid

You were quite a hefty man, though—

And imperial to metric size conversions must be right

If a brawny lad is shy of flashing too much of his manhood to the night…

You were going out commando—

You were bonny, you were bold but there was panic in your eye

You’re a regimental man, though—

In a badly tailored garment that keeps crawling up your knees

And the next sub-zero puff of artic wind will bare your sporran to the breeze!

Blame that tailor back in old Hong Kong—the size is wrong, Commando!

Can’t believe that you would take this chance sans underpants, Commando!

It’s a bummer that you’ve got no class—so cover your mass

Catch your kilt before it disappears—you’re in arrears—Commando!

We have made your bail, Commando—

We have offered words of pardon to that busload full of nuns

When you dropped your lunch, Commando

You retrieved your Quarter Pounder and exposed them to your buns

And we’ll try to hide the those photos on your Facebook from our daughters and our sons

Blame that tailor back in old Hong Kong—the size is wrong, Commando!

Can’t believe that you would take this chance sans underpants, Commando!

It’s a bummer that you’ve got no class—so cover your mass

Catch your kilt before it disappears—you’re in arrears—Commando!

Blame that tailor back in old Hong Kong—the size is wrong, Commando!

Can’t believe that you would take this chance sans underpants, Commando!

Better light your candle double quick—you’ve frozen your wick!

Catch your kilt before it disappears—you’re in arrears—Commando!

Catch your kilt before it disappears—you’re in arrears—Commando!

(And here's the original by ABBA...)

Feb. 19th, 2010